Ah, the good old days when recess was the biggest thing on my mind and when homework lasted 30 minutes at the extreme end of the torture scale. It was back then when making the grade really meant that my mom guided me through the dangers of flunking my spelling test. You’d think that 10 words wouldn’t be that hard to memorize, but remember, my attention span was weak for things that didn’t include running, marbles or causing trouble.

Well, not that I’m older and COLLEGE is the new thing I find that recess never was in the long term plans for educators and that marbles has been replaced with thoughts of ladies. So, while I still need time to stretch and run around and while my mind is still distracted with the things that distract the mind of college kid, I have to find new strategies to make the grade that was so dutifully helped by my mother in “the good ‘ol days.”

Here are three things that I’ve leeched form my experience thus far as a college student. Perhaps if you apply them you’ll get finish your courses in under 20 years. Yeah, so what if I am an eternal student…you’re gonna benefit from my wisdom right now, so sit down and learn something!

Tip 1: If the teacher catches you day dreaming or throwing a note to a cute girl, you’re in for it. While the olden days may have got me put in time out or sent to the principle’s office if it was my third offense, now in college there’s a silent black list the teacher keeps that’s worse than either. Getting on the right list is essential to any drooling hopeful’s strategy of passing your classes. If your class is online it’s much easier to goof off, but just make sure you aren’t sending chat messages about your teachers fly being down over the class chat feature, that’s an automatic eBlacklist!

Tip 2: Since these days you may not even be physically attending the college you choose, especially if it’s a purely online campus you don’t need to worry about what the town is like. Instead you’re going to want to think about what the online environment of the college can offer you. It’s a bummer that you can’t really stick cute little notes folded into heart shapes into the cute boy who sits next to you in biology, but if you’re creative you may still be able to find ways to flirt with boys in class on the internet. If this is your prime objective, which would be pretty cool if it were, you’re gonna want to makes sure your potential class has features that let you contact other students, see their fotos or at very least share your Facebook profile url with them. If the school you’re looking into is flirt-free, you’re gonna want to get the flirt out.

Tip 3: Aright, because I most likely have ADD, I never could sit down long enough to work a schedule, and mostly because I didn’t need to with my mother a the scheduler, but again, now is different. Without a class schedule that details my study times and test dates, etc., I’m done for! So, if you’re spacey like me, make a simple list of when you’re going to do classes, when you’re going to study and when you’re going to get your flirt on. It’s also helpful to plan in rewards for successful use of your allotted time. My preferences are chocolate milk and/or pizza.

I’m serious, if you learn from me, you may just pass your classes.

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